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Description: Mothering through Breastfeeding: The Early Years
ISSUE 2014 2 Active Living with Children Camping with a Breastfeeding Child One Family s Remote Camping Experiences and Tips Mothers Stories Breastfeeding a Baby with Congenital Heart Disease Focus on Fathers Fathers Thoughts on Breastfeeding and Nursing in Public Mothering through Breastfeeding The Early Years pdf version e Click her e Click her e Click her text only pdf e Click her rinted our p to order y now copy past issues follow us on facebook visit lllusa.org to access breastfeeding resources and information get the newest issue right into your inbox Click here to sign up for the New Beginnings e-blast Have you considered a tribute gift to La Leche League USA (LLL USA) You can make a donation to LLL USA in the name of a family member or friend to honor or remember them. Your tax-deductible donation will show that you care about them while also helping LLL USA further its mission to help mothers breastfeed. Donations of any amount will be gratefully accepted for a minimum gift of 25 New Beginnings will publish your special message of congratulations encouragement appreciation or condolences.To submit a tribute gift please send a check and the tribute wording to LLL USA 4475 N. Jefferson Avenue Miami Beach FL 33140 or click on the donate tab at the top of the page at www.LLLUSA.org to submit your tribute and make a donation to LLL USA via credit card e-check or PayPal. Anonymous gifts are also appreciated.  Mothering through Breastfeeding The Early Years  Mothers Stories Our Getaway Weekend Venita s Story Breastfeeding a Baby with Congenital Heart Disease  Eating Wisely Children in the Kitchen Instilling Healthy Eating Habits  Upcoming LLL USA Events  Loving that Baby Smell  United States Breastfeeding Committee Report Breastfeeding News from Across the Country  Active Living with Children Camping with a Breastfeeding Child One Family s Remote Camping Experiences and Tips  Staying Home Help With Cleaning  Toddler Tips Teaching Kind Behavior  Making it Work Encouraging a Letdown while Pumping  Focus on Fathers Fathers Thoughts on Breastfeeding and Nursing in Public Inspiration I feel that breastfeeding gives the mother a vision of what a human person is. Personally it led me to self-discovery and to a greater appreciation of the full humanity of the babies who were entrusted to me. Each woman needs to trust her own instincts her own feelings and her own sense of what will work for her with each baby. LLLI co-Founder Viola Lennon 2 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 Editor s Note Issue 2 2014 Volume 39 2014 La Leche League United States of America A Managing Editor Amy Nelson Contributing Editors Karin Ali Cathy DeRaleau Nanny Gortzak Amanda Jo Greep Jodie Kilpatrick Winema Lanoue Jean Merrill Micki Sellers Review Board Fran Dereszynski Judith Gibel Diane Jeffer Carol Kolar CarolAnn Napoleon Art Director Yael Breimer Cover Photo Shutterstock.com Photo Credits Unless otherwise credited all photos are from LLLI or Shutterstock.com. Pg 9 Katie Combs Pg 11 Nicole Love Weber Pg 20 21 Mike & Megan Holmes Pg 24 25 Robin Adams Photography. Acceptance of paid advertisements does not constitute an LLL USA endorsement of the product advertised. Please write to advertise lllusa.org if you are interested in advertising in New Beginnings. La Leche League International and its subsidiary La Leche League USA fully support the WHO (World Health Organization) International Code of Marketing of Breastmilk Substitutes. LLLI Board of Directors (2006) fter experiencing a winter that seemed as if it would never completely lose its grasp we are quickly approaching the long hot days of summer. At times these mild spring days feel like a fleeting memory. Just as the different seasons of weather pass by and require us to adjust our way of life--wardrobe activities etc.--so the seasons of mothering through breastfeeding in the early years require that we adjust our way of life to meet our child s needs. Sarah Lin explores this part of the parenting journey and shares her thoughts on how to fully enjoy the changing and sometimes challenging days of the first few years. Our Mothers Stories include one mother s look back at the getaway trip she and her husband took--with their toddler in tow. Then as mother of nine Venita Garner shares her breastfeeding experiences yet another mother relives the scary days and months after her daughter was born with a congenital heart defect. We also have information about a recent study that examines the addictive quality of baby smell as well as a schedule of upcoming events throughout LLL USA and an update from the United States Breastfeeding Committee. Our regular columns include tips on how children can help with household cleaning what to do when play dates hit rocky patches and reassurance for mothers who are worried about being able to pump enough breast milk in preparation for returning to work. Jodi Kilpatrick compiles thoughts on nursing and breastfeeding in public from a variety of fathers for Focus on Fathers. In Eating Wisely Amanda Jo Greep shares ideas about instilling healthy eating habits in children and how to include them in the kitchen from a young age. And in what will be an occasional feature--Active Living with Children--Winema Wilson Lanoue spotlights the camping experiences of one family and shares their tips for camping and hiking with breastfeeding children. Enjoy these lovely days of outdoor play I always welcome messages from readers whether it s feedback suggestions contributions or questions. Drop me a line at nbeditor lllusa.org. Amy Nelson Amy Nelson is a La Leche League Leader in the small Missouri River town of Yankton South Dakota where she lives with her husband Cory and their four children Accalia (15) Cole (11) Ella (8) and Tylan (5). Amy can be reached at nbeditor lllusa.org New Beginnings is published by La Leche League United States of America 15 Two Penny Run West Pilesgrove NJ 08098 Visit our website at www.lllusa.org If you wish to receive a link to each new issue as it is published visit http tinyurl.com GetNewBeginnings to add yourself to the list directly or send your name and email address to nbsubscribe lllusa.org and ask to be added to the distribution list for New Beginnings. The mission of La Leche League USA is to help mothers to breastfeed through mother-to-mother support encouragement information and education and to promote a better understanding of breastfeeding as an important element in the healthy development of the baby and mother. 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 3 Mothering Through Breastfeeding The Early Years Mothering through Breastfeeding The Early Years B By By Sarah Lin Santa Clara California producing 100 percent of the food this new little person needs to grow Your milk supply is established in the first six weeks so it is vital that you spend that time nursing your baby as often as is needed--in other words on cue. This is the time to rely on your partner and or family and friends to help with essential tasks such as preparing meals and doing household chores and let everything else fall by the wayside. Sleeping when the baby sleeps is as much a priority as getting to know this new person in your life. Our lives are still largely focused on baby s nursing and napping needs during the rest of the first year. In addition to altering your standards you might need to create new routines or alternative solutions for feeding your family sleeping or attending to your relationship with your partner. Feed Yourself Feed Your Family (La Leche League International 2012) is a great resource for eating healthy while nursing. There are helpful and practical suggestions for planning meals with a child (or children) on hand as well as lots of healthy recipes for the whole family. Simple meals are in order during this season of your life. A slow cooker can be invaluable as you can add the ingredients earlier in the day--perhaps when baby is napping--and then attend to your baby until dinner. Babies are still quite portable throughout most of the first year more likely to be content in your arms or in a baby carrier rather than determined to crawl or run around at every opportunity. It can be tempting to run from errand to errand to accomplish everything on your to-do list. However this can delay feedings as you may find yourself trying to soothe your child to be content through just one more stop. Additionally it can take the reastfeeding is a relationship an invitation to focus on your child. Each nursing session is an opportunity to take a break from the hectic world around you and be mindful of your child s needs. Mothering through breastfeeding can expand that focus to all aspects of your parenting life. As you travel through the first few years of parenting meeting your child s breastfeeding needs impacts the rest of your life in many ways including eating sleeping socializing and running a household. The First Year During your baby s first few months it may seem as if breastfeeding consumes the majority of your time. This intense period of time means that you might need to reprioritize the importance of housework or socializing as you develop your breastfeeding relationship. While a baby is no longer part of your body when he is born in reality your body is still 4 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 Mothering Through Breastfeeding The Early Years Breastfeeding is a relationship an invitation to focus on your child. Each nursing session is an opportunity to take a break from the hectic world around you and be mindful of your child s needs. focus off nurturing and interacting with your growing child. Asking for help or letting your partner take care of some of these errands (even if they are not done exactly right ) can ensure that your milk supply stays steady and you are able to bond with your baby. Sleep or lack thereof can be a real challenge that lessens gradually as baby grows. It can be hard to focus on your child when you are sleep-deprived and exhausted during the day. While you may sometimes feel that your baby should be able to sleep for longer stretches at night breastfed babies do have real nighttime needs. Breast milk is digested in about 90 minutes so your baby really does need to wake throughout the night to nurse Dr. William Sears The Baby Sleep Book has useful suggestions for coping with this reality. The first is in regards to your state of mind realizing that babies require nighttime parenting and need as much care and attention at night as they do during the day. Secondly Dr. Sears advocates evaluating your daytime lifestyle so that you can sleep better at night. During the day you might need to nap when the baby naps instead of doing housework cooking or spending time reading or on the computer. Another area to examine might be sleeping arrangements. You will probably find yourself wanting to be close to baby at night. You might sleep in the same bed or have a crib or co-sleeper next to you so that less energy is expended during nighttime feeds. Your partner might temporarily move to another bed or room. Consider an arrangement that allows the most sleep for everyone during the night. may be fewer nighttime feedings toddlers still need to reconnect with mother after a busy day of exploring and growing independence. Sleeping arrangements might shift again as baby gets older but the need for nighttime parenting continues. Life with a nursing toddler is very interesting They are active and explore everything to satisfy their growing curiosity but they still need to touch base with you and may continue to nurse frequently. It can be helpful at this stage to revisit what is most important. Life can get really busy on weekends especially if both parents work outside of the home and try to catch up on household chores and errands over the course of these two days. A toddler still needs time to nurse and connect with his parents. Without this daily connection tantrums and acting out can become more prevalent. Both children and parents should allow for down time each day. Norma Jane Bumgarner wrote in Mothering Your Nursing Toddler Just as nursing is the only time some especially active toddlers hold still for loving so nursing is the only time some busy mothers sit still for that same loving. In addition to thinking of creative solutions for feeding and taking care of the family you may choose to limit the amount of errands and activities you have during this stage. Going to parks museums and play dates are all great fun but quite often there are not enough hours in the day for childrearing basic household tasks and going out and about. Focusing on your little one s needs and how much busyness he is able to contentedly handle can clarify how to allocate your time on a daily and weekly basis. Bumgarner also wrote A child in the second and third year needs a great deal of attention. These busy years of rapid growth are times when we all have to minimize our other commitments in order to help our children grow. It can be hard to say no to social engagements extracurricular activities a clean house and sometimes even time for yourself. When you need time to recharge think of ways you can combine tasks whether putting together freezer meals with a friend for socialization or taking a walk with your child or children so that everyone can enjoy fresh air and exercise. Bumgarner continues It is more important to the future happiness and Norma Jane Bumgarner wrote in Mothering Your Nursing Toddler Just as nursing is the only time some especially active toddlers hold still for loving so nursing is the only time some busy mothers sit still for that same loving. Life with a Toddler and Beyond During baby s second year nighttime parenting is still important. Although there 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 5 Mothering Through Breastfeeding The Early Years security of your child...that you be available to him as much as you can. Taking the long view here can help adjust your expectations having a secure attachment to a child who grows up to be a happy well-adjusted person really is the most valuable use of your time. Indeed Bumgarner continues on that no mother of a child in the second or third year should expect to accomplish great things beyond rearing a great child. You should expect to share household tasks with your partner or just let go of as many as possible. Sharing household tasks as well as lowering expectations is key. Nurslings over age two are a much more capable and helpful part of the family but still need that time to connect with you although on a less frequent basis than in infancy. They still have a hard time handling big emotions and can tire or become overwhelmed easily. Trying to run a household with a two or three year old underfoot is quite challenging and weekends can be even busier. Bumgarner advises that the key to surviving the active unpredictable preschool years is laziness-- well laziness coupled with the ability to accept tiredness as a part of life sometimes. She goes on to explain that to the outside world it may look like laziness but in reality keeping up with the needs of a preschooler is a far cry from being lazy. In truth focusing on the needs of the child and breastfeeding on demand can offer parents a chance to slow down and pause to meet the child where they are which is beneficial to both parties. Creative solutions are still in order as what worked with a toddler may no longer fit for your preschooler. Grocery shopping might need to be done by one partner on a weeknight after everyone else is sleeping. Instead of visiting stores all over town families might need to limit their choices to one store even if the selection is less than desirable so that time together is maximized. If finances permit some families choose to order groceries online and have them delivered in order to minimize their time spent shopping (and potential meltdowns in the cereal aisle ). Other families might choose to get creative with their cooking habits utilizing the slow cooker or making meals ahead and freezing them or even planning and cooking an entire month s worth of meals in one weekend. There is nothing wrong with relying on cereal sandwiches and fresh produce for the bulk of your meals if it affords your children the time and attention they need. Tandem Nursing At this point in many mothers lives siblings might also be added to the mix and you might be nursing two When tandem nursing (nursing two or more children) or nursing while pregnant it is just as important to be able to rest and to have a strong support system. Nursing can actually help in this regard as it offers you times throughout the day when you can stop and rest knowing your little one(s) are not getting into trouble Having these little breaks can help you take care of yourself but it is also important to have a strong support system whether it s your husband or partner a family member or a close friend. Your helper can support you by assisting with childcare so you can get more rest and or help with cooking or housework. You can focus on eating healthy and getting light exercise. Reducing activities and obligations during this time in favor of focusing on the needs of nurslings can help you cope with the responsibilities and challenges of your growing family. During a child s early years they have a real need for their mother that is as vital as their need for food. Breastfeeding brings During a child s early years they have a real need for their mother that is as vital as their need for food. Breastfeeding brings both of those together in the beginning yet even as children grow their needs invite us to slow down and focus on that relationship. both of those together in the beginning yet even as children grow their needs invite us to slow down and focus on that relationship. Especially during the first few years we might choose to shift our priorities toward our family and prioritize meeting our children s needs over activities and busyness that can take away from what is most important. Mothering through breastfeeding allows us to make space in our lives for our children to pause and keep them close listening to what they are telling us. Sarah Lin is a La Leche League Leader with LLL of Mountain View (California) and a part-time law librarian. She lives in Santa Clara California with her children Bennett (4) and Bridget (1). 6 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 Mothers Stories Our Getaway Weekend T here was a time when I was a new mother getting all kinds of advice. It was sometimes more stressful than I expected to raise a baby My husband and I wanted to go on a nice little vacation. You need to get away we were told in other words meaning to get away from the baby. So in February of 1992 we decided to go to a hotel for a weekend for my birthday. Jocelyn was about 15 months old and still nursing frequently so she came with us. Yes I had sitters whom I trusted and Jocelyn liked but 48 hours apart My gut said No way. It was the slow season for tourism so the hotel we checked into was nearly empty. It was in a town called Cochem on the Mosel River. (My husband was in the Air Force and we were stationed in Germany at this time.) Cochem was a cute little town with a cool castle and lots of shops and restaurants. We arrived at this little hotel and unpacked. Jocelyn was thrilled to be in a new place. We walked around the town strolling and people watching. We had wonderful warm German food excellent bread wines salads vegetables meats etc. When we were tired of being out we retired to the hotel. It had a small pool and we swam together. Finally we were tired enough to just go and chill out in our room. We turned on the television and watched the opening ceremonies of the Winter Olympics in Albertville France. Jocelyn was tuckered out and fell asleep pretty quickly. All three of us had a blast that weekend and I didn t have to worry about feeling guilty from leaving Jocelyn behind. I knew she just wasn t ready for that separation yet. Yes we did get away that weekend. But it wasn t the baby from which we were getting away it was work schedules the phone the computer dishes housework etc. That weekend was a new beginning for me. I now understood at a deeper level something that I wasn t sure of before. There were some things that we did that were perhaps a little countercultural but we would decide what worked best for our family. La Leche League helped me to recognize and stand up for my needs and for my baby s needs. If you empower a mother to think for herself and trust her gut you never know what good will come of it Kim Moss-Allen La Leche League of Bellevue Nebraska Connect with Other LLL Mothers Join a Local LLL Group Find a local Group at http www.llli.org search groups Visit the La Leche League Mother-to-Mother Forums The La Leche League Mother-toMother Forums offer breastfeeding support 24 7. You ll find a collection of resources and threads about various breastfeeding and parenting concerns. You can join the conversation and post questions to get the breastfeeding and parenting support you need. Forums.llli.org index.php Or visit the Forums on Facebook at https www.facebook.com groups 121622974680477 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 7 Mothers Stories Breastfeeding a Baby with Congenital Heart Disease W hen I was 22 years old my eyes opened to a whole new world of tests procedures surgery and fighting for my daughter s life. I gave birth to a baby girl with congenital heart disease. My pregnancy was wonderful as I also ran after my two-year-old son. At every ultrasound and check up I was told my daughter was perfect but measuring slightly smaller than normal. I am small myself--only 4 feet 11 inches--so my doctor assured me that my baby would most likely take after me. My daughter was born on July 29 2013. She weighed seven pounds and was 19-3 4 inches long. She searched for comfort as soon as she was delivered. I immediately put her to my breast. As my husband stood by my side and cut the umbilical cord I took in all of her beauty. She was perfect beautiful dark hair that covered her perfectly shaped head big gorgeous blue eyes all 10 fingers all 10 toes and the cutest little nose to match her tiny little ears. At that moment I realized we had picked the perfect name for her Emalee Noel. We spent the next three days in the hospital without any health or breastfeeding issues. When the time came to be discharged the nurse arrived with my papers stating that I was discharged but that Emalee would need further testing the hospital pediatrician would be in shortly to talk with us. He explained that they heard a murmur and would need to perform an echocardiogram. A pediatric cardiologist would examine this test to determine its significance. It took about six hours for the test to be performed and results to be relayed. The test determined that Emalee had two holes in her heart. I choked back the tears as the doctor explained that Emalee s heart was overworking itself. He calmly and thoroughly explained that oxygen rich blood was mixing with oxygen poor blood creating the murmur. Congenital heart disease three words that changed my family s life forever. Emalee was discharged and we were instructed to follow up with a pediatric cardiologist in two weeks. We continued to make the 40-minute drive one way to cardiology appointments every other week. Emalee s heart began to fail at six weeks old. Emalee grew very weak. She strained to catch her breath during tummy time and nursing. There were times she was resting and we could see her struggle to catch her next breath. Her next appointment with cardiology was different. Instead of returning home Emalee was admitted to the hospital. She began medication to lower her heart rate and decrease fluid on her liver. It was a short but Every day I was on a roller coaster ride of emotions. I blamed myself. I questioned God. I searched our family histories for others with heart defects. It was impossible to believe that my perfect daughter had an imperfect heart. 8 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 Mothers Stories stressful stay. We returned home three days later with daily medication to give to Emalee. During her hospital stay the staff discussed the possibility of surgery with us. There was a 95 percent chance that surgery would be necessary. Two weeks later it was determined that the medications were only buying time and surgery was needed immediately. Every day I was on a roller coaster ride of emotions. I blamed myself. I questioned God. I searched our family histories for others with heart defects. It was impossible to believe that my perfect daughter had an imperfect heart. A few days before surgery I came to the realization that trying to find the cause was not going to fix Emalee s heart. She needed open heart surgery. Most people will never know what it s like to hand their baby over to a nurse for surgery. My amazing husband had to be strong enough for both of us. He handed over our two-month-old daughter knowing the possibility of losing her. Surgery was expected to last four to six hours. Emalee had rolling veins so it took a little longer to start the intravenous (IV) therapy and surgery took around nine hours. During the wait one of the nurses informed me of a nursing room where I could pump to keep my supply up and relieve the engorgement. I was amazed by the support the hospital offered to a breastfeeding mother. When the time came to see Emalee no words can describe the way she looked lying in this tiny bed with all of the machines wires IVs chest tube monitors breathing tube and bandages covering her. Many wouldn t be able to look past it all but all I could see was my beautiful baby girl. The next few days were rough. Her pain management and breathing tube removal seemed to take forever. She was unable to nurse until the tube had been removed for several hours. On day three it was finally removed and she was offered a bottle of expressed milk.. Emalee had never taken a bottle but her doctor insisted so they could measure how much she was eating. By this time I had the hospital freezer stocked with my milk so it was easy to get a bottle ready. Emalee Katie Combs took her first nursing Emalee and last ounce of expressed milk. Who knew they would be one and the same She refused every other bottle the nurses tried to give her. I refused to give her the bottles. After I explained that I could keep a log of how often and long she actively nursed I was allowed to nurse again. But I still couldn t hold her. As I mentioned before I am very petite. I tried standing on tiptoes sitting in a tall desk chair and my husband even tried holding me up (his idea not mine.) Once a nurse realized I was too short to just casually lean over I received a stool. I was back in business feeding my beautiful baby. The nurses and doctors kept calling others in to witness a mother s backbreaking love and dedication. They were so supportive of my decision to continue breastfeeding and informed me that most mothers give up during times like these. Late the following day Emalee s cardiologist said I could hold her to nurse. Even though she was still connected to several monitors and a chest tube I was able to sit in a wooden rocking chair and the nurse placed Emalee in my arms. It felt amazing to hold my daughter again. Emalee spent a week in the hospital and was discharged to follow up with cardiology five days later. Everything looked wonderful at her post-operative appointment. She has seen the cardiologist three times since that appointment and her next appointment is six months away. Emalee s cardiology staff holds a special place in our hearts but we definitely enjoy not needing to see them. Today Emalee is still exclusively breastfed and is showing wonderful results on all cardiology tests. She is just as beautiful as she was when she was born. She has doubled her birth weight and is on track with all of her milestones. Even though Emalee s journey as a heart patient is far from over she has proven to be stronger than anyone I ve ever known. Katheryn Combs Jacksonville Florida The nurses and doctors kept calling others in to witness a mother s backbreaking love and dedication. They were so supportive of my decision to continue breastfeeding and informed me that most mothers give up during times like these. 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 9 Mothers Stories and almost never had to use my covers again. When problems arose I called a lactation consultant who was also a La Leche League Leader. She helped me to correct my second baby s latch and soon I began attending La Leche League meetings. I knew that at these meetings I wouldn t hear advice such as You re pregnant You should wean. I used to think I would wean when my nursling had a full mouth of teeth. Now I know I will not wean because of a full set of teeth because one tooth or a whole set doesn t matter when baby has a good latch. I have learned there is no amount of pain that is too much because I have now nursed through numerous cracks engorgement plugged milk ducts and a blister on my nipple--signs that latch or positioning likely weren t correct. I ve nursed through mastitis and pregnancy. I ve tandem nursed. We did have to use formula on a sparing basis with my ninth child. I had one working breast and while many women have no problem exclusively breastfeeding with one breast it took about eight weeks to establish my supply. My husband had one simple rule for those bottles the mother does not feed the baby the bottle. I have nursed all my babies until the next one is almost here. Some have weaned before the next one was on the way. That has not happened often. Sometimes as my little ones became the big kids it meant I would spend time sitting and nursing the baby and the older kids would do more of the work around the house. Is it worth it Yes This is your baby and this time will never come again. When you have done nothing but hold and cuddle a baby all day you have taught a small human being about love. Venita Garner Montgomery Alabama Your Story or Photo in New Beginnings New Beginnings would like to hear from you about mothering breastfeeding birth or fathers who have positively impacted you or your children s lives. If you are interested in submitting your story please contact Amy at nbeditor lllusa.org. Your photographs are always welcome. For image submitting guidelines contact Amy at nbeditor lllusa.org. Venita s Story I remember the first time my mother tried to talk me out of wanting a baby. I was just married and young. What about formula she asked. We re not going to use formula I replied. Oh responded my mother. It turned out though that I did use formula. An older mother at my workplace had told me babies don t like pumped milk. I didn t know about La Leche League then and I didn t know my coworker was incorrect. I would pump and give it to my daughter in her cereal but I would use formula if she had a bottle. I gave my daughter a bottle during the day and I would nurse her at night. At nine months she went on a nursing strike. I thought it was self-weaning. When I had my second child I declared No formula No bottles I have not looked back. When my third child was born nursing pillows were just coming on the market. I made my own nursing covers. When this baby was about six months old I discovered slings. I was able to combine nursing shirts and slings Pre-order the newest book from LLLI Sweet Sleep http store.llli.org internal profile 876 re Click he NEW Buy to 10 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 Upcoming LLL USA Events Upcoming LLL USA Events Here are some upcoming opportunities for Leaders and families to gather and share information about breastfeeding and LLL. My Senses July 18-20 LLL of Texas Conference Preserving Our Future Through Breastfeeding. South Shore Harbor Resort and Conference Center League City Texas. Featuring LLL co-Founder Marian Tompson and Barbara Wilson Clay BS IBCLC FILCA. For more information go to www.texaslllconference.org or contact Christina at ccicack gmail.com Come here my love let me drink you in Let me hold you near and melt with the warmth of your skin Your baby coos wind chimes in my ear Every sigh of content is perceptively clear Your dimpled hand feathers on my chest Your softness is my luxury to caress Baby perfume infuses my soul Imprints on my memory for my future to behold Baby blues gazing into my eyes with curious intensity Brightness fills my soul with beautiful luminosity Nursing you in our chair as we rock the world away All else stands still as my senses savor this day Nicole Love Weber LLL of Wellington Florida September 19 LLL of Mountain Plains Healthcare Provider Conference. Mount Vernon Event Center Golden Colorado. Featuring Liz Brooks JD IBCLC FILCA. For more information contact Bekki at lllbekkihenthorn gmail.com or go to www.coloradobreastfeedingconference.com October 10-12 LLL of Florida and Caribbean Islands Breastfeeding and Parenting Conference Celebrate FamiLLLies Love Laugh and Learn. International Palms Resort and Conference Center Cocoa Beach Florida. Featuring Dr. Jack Newman and Kelly Bonyata BS IBCLC. For more information go to www.floridaparentingconference.com or contact Jen at lalecheconf gmail.com November 7 LLL of Wisconsin Continuing Education Day Assessment and Treatment of Tongue-Tie Lip-Tie and Suck Dysfunction. Hilton Garden Inn Milwaukee Park Place Milwaukee Wisconsin. Featuring Dr. Larry Kotlow DDS and Dr. Allison Hazelbaker PhD IBCLC FILCA CST RCST. For more information go to www.lllofwi.org events or contact acewi lllofwi.org Nicole and son Maxwell 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 11 Loving that Baby Smell Loving that Baby Smell By Kate Kerr Lyons Colorado G entle reader I may not know you but I know something about you. We have an instant bond that goes far beyond our politics religions economic backgrounds or cultures. The bond is this We all love breastfeeding and we all love babies. Is it possible that we also all share an addiction Don t worry. It s not a bad thing. I will always remember carrying my firstborn in a baby carrier and how much I loved leaning down to sniff the top of his head. He is now nearly 31 years old and I can almost remember that exact scent. Apparently I am not alone. Recently a group of international researchers discovered that the way babies smell triggers the reward centers of the brain. The researchers had newborns wear the same pajamas for their first two nights. Mothers were hooked to a magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) scan to see what effects would be found when they smelled the pajamas. Even women who had never had children responded with activation in their brain reward centers also known as the caudate nucleus. Johannes Frasnelli a postdoctoral researcher and lecturer at the University of Montreal s Department of Psychology says Not all odors trigger this reaction. Only those associated with reward such as food or satisfying a desire cause this activation. Have you ever craved something like coffee or chocolate and feel so content when you finally consume it The brain reward center is what gives us that feeling of satisfaction. Research indicates that we are biologically wired to feel fulfilled by the magnificent odors of babies. It would be interesting to do this odor testing with men especially fathers. It would also be interesting to compare the effects of odors from breastfed versus non-breastfed babies. In the meantime researchers believe that our sense of smell combined with this reward mechanism in our brains is part of the biologically essential strong attachment between mother and baby. 12 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 Loving that Baby Smell Tips for Calming Your Fussy Baby Offer the breast. Try the magic baby hold also known as the colic hold. (See page 117 of The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding for a detailed description.) Don t forget to check the diaper. A change of scenery might help. Go outside and walk around the neighborhood. Take a car ride. Take a bath together. The combination of low lights and warm water can be very soothing. Carry your baby in a sling or other carrier. Wearing your baby often throughout the day can even help prevent some fussiness. Create white noise run the vacuum turn on a fan play static on the radio. Undress your baby. Clothes may be causing discomfort. Movement may help. Try rocking or gently bouncing. Put on some music and dance together. Overstimulation might be causing the fussiness. Go to a quiet dark room together. Give your baby a massage. Sing or talk to your baby. Offer the breast again. Your baby may not be hungry but the comfort of the breast may be just what he or she needs (even if it didn t help the first time). Advertise In New Beginnings Each issue reaches over 12 000 families in the US and countless others around the world. Like New Beginnings k on Faceboo An e-magazine full of inspiring stories helpful information news and reviews for expectant parents breastfeeding mothers and their families and supporters at all stages of the parenting journey. view rates For more information please contact Tina Castellanos at advertise lllusa.org e Click her 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 13 United States Breastfeeding Committee Report Breastfeeding News from Across the Country By Brenda Bandy LLL USA representative to USBC leadership in the field. La Leche League USA and La Leche League International presented gifts to Dr. Naylor and Dr. Lawrence in recognition of their deep history and contributions to La Leche League. In addition to the Legacy Award USBC is also establishing the Drs. Ruth Lawrence & Audrey Naylor Legacy Scholarship to support attendance at the National Breastfeeding Coalitions Conference. breastfeeding and how responders can help. The Role of Fathers in Maternal and Child Health Home Visits An article published in the November December 2013 issue of the Association of Maternal & Child Health Programs (AMCHP) Pulse newsletter discusses the role of fathers in maternal and child health home visits including their impact on breastfeeding. New USBC Members Centering Healthcare Institute The work of the Centering Healthcare Institute is to improve maternal child health through the first evidence-based innovation in prenatal care in over 100 years. The Centering group model of care includes three components health assessment interactive learning and community building. The Centering Healthcare Institute provides consultation and technical assistance to sites to implement the model. Black Mothers Breastfeeding Association The Black Mothers Breastfeeding Association (BMBFA) was established in 2007 with the mission to reduce racial inequities in breastfeeding support for African Americans by building foundational networks of support and strengthening systems to overcome historical societal and social barriers to breastfeeding success. Bill Introduced to Require TRICARE to Cover Breastfeeding Expenses Missouri Senator Claire McCaskill has introduced federal legislation that would provide for the availability of breastfeeding support supplies and counseling under the TRICARE program which provides military health care benefits. Senator McCaskill aims to provide members of the military and their families with health care coverage consistent with the private sector. Save the Date The Fifth National Conference of Breastfeeding Coalitions will be held August 2-4 in Arlington Virginia. Registration information is available on the United States Breastfeeding Committee s (USBC) conference website. Sibling Study from Social Science & Medicine A new study published in the journal Social Science & Medicine suggested that some of the benefits of breastfeeding have been overstated. The study used sibling comparisons to estimate the effect of breastfeeding on long-term body mass index (BMI) obesity asthma hyperactivity attachment compliance and academic achievement and competence. Significant media attention surrounding the study has resulted in inaccurate and incomplete reporting on the proven impact of breastfeeding on public health prompting responses from around the globe including The Huffington Post Shouting Fire in a Room of Scientists Breastfeeding and Sensationalism Breastfeeding Medicine blog Reports on breastfeeding sibling study are vastly overstated Baby Milk Action Did US researchers really find breastfeeding to be ineffective or harmful Break Time for Nursing Mothers New Online Guide The United States Breastfeeding Committee (USBC) has published a new resource to help breastfeeding employees understand their rights in the workplace. What You Need to Know About the Break Time for Nursing Mothers law combines information from all federal sources addressing the law into a user-friendly online guide. This resource was developed in response to real questions from families and employers from across the nation. Infant Feeding During Disasters Infographic The Office of Human Services Emergency Preparedness and Response an office of the Administration for Children & Families in the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services has published Infant Feeding During Disasters. This infographic highlights why breastfeeding matters during disasters barriers to breastfeeding during a disaster benefits of United States Breastfeeding Committee Legacy Award On January 24 the United States Breastfeeding Committee established the Inaugural USBC Legacy Award to honor the lifelong achievements of Drs. Audrey Naylor and Ruth Lawrence. A reception held in coordination with the semi-annual USBC membership meeting celebrated their extraordinary commitment dedication and 14 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 United States Breastfeeding Committee Report Oklahoma Ban the Bag Update The Oklahoma State Department of Health announced that seven more Oklahoma hospitals have joined with hospitals already participating in the Ban the Bag initiative and have agreed to stop the practice of sending new mothers home with commercial formula discharge bags. The current total of 28 hospitals means Oklahoma is 50 percent bag-free. Lactation Counselors and operated in partnership with Le Bonheur Children s Hospital in Memphis. Hotline staff members are available 24 hours a day seven days a week to assist breastfeeding mothers and partners their families expectant mothers and health care providers seeking breastfeeding support and information. The toll-free number is 1-855-4BF-MOMS (1-855-423-6667). New Jersey Adopts State Regulations to Support Breastfeeding State regulations adopted in New Jersey require hospitals to be more supportive of mothers who choose to breastfeed making New Jersey the fourth state to have such regulations. Hospitals are now required to develop and implement written policies and procedures for identifying and supporting the needs of a breastfeeding mother and or child. Tennessee Breastfeeding Hotline The Tennessee Department of Health has launched the Tennessee Breastfeeding Hotline staffed by International Board Certified Lactation Consultants and Certified Brenda Bandy lives in Manhattan Kansas with her husband and four children. She has been an LLL Leader for over 16 years and an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant (IBCLC) since 2010. She currently serves as the La Leche League alternate representative to the United States Breastfeeding Committee and the Area Professional Liaison for LLL of Kansas and continues to serve mothers and babies as a local LLL Leader. Resources United States Breastfeeding Committee 2014 Conference www.usbreastfeeding.org Coalitions NationalConference 2014Conference tabid 376 Default.aspx What You Need to Know About the Break Time for Nursing Mothers online guide www.usbreastfeeding.org Employment WorkplaceSupport WorkplaceSupportinFederalLaw tabid 175 Default.aspx United States Breastfeeding Committee Legacy Award www.usbreastfeeding.org AboutUs History USBCLegacyAward tabid 380 Default.aspx Centering Healthcare Institute centeringhealthcare.org Centering Healthcare Institute model overview centeringhealthcare.org pages centering-model model-overview.php Black Mothers Breastfeeding Association blackmothersbreastfeeding.org Infant Feeding During Disasters Infographic www.acf.hhs.gov programs ohsepr infant-feeding-during-disasters Supporting Maternal and Child Health by Involving Fathers on Home Visits www.amchp.org AboutAMCHP Newsletters Pulse Archive 2013 NovDec2013 Pages Feature7.aspx TRICARE Breastfeeding Expenses Legislation www.gpo.gov fdsys pkg BILLS-113s1994is pdf BILLS-113s1994is.pdf Shouting Fire in a Room of Scientists Breastfeeding and Sensationalism www.huffingtonpost.com melissa-bartick shouting-fire-in-a-room-o_b_4899803.html Reports on Breastfeeding Sibling Study are Vastly Overstated bfmed.wordpress.com 2014 03 01 reports-on-breastfeeding-sibling-study-are-vastly-overstated Did US researchers really find breastfeeding to be ineffective or harmful info.babymilkaction.org news campaignblog280214 New Jersey State Breastfeeding Regulations www.njspotlight.com stories 14 01 23 hospitals-required-to-promote-breastfeeding-support-nursing-mothers Tennessee Breastfeeding Hotline wgnsradio.com new-for-the-volunteer-state-the-tennessee-breastfeeding-hotline-cms-17895 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 15 Staying Home Teaching Kind Behavior Help With Cleaning I My six year old loves to help me with household tasks. He also has a competitive streak in him. So I give him a task to complete and tell him that I am positive I will finish mine before he completes his task. I make sure that the chore I give him is something that he can easily complete by himself like putting his toys away or picking up his clothes. After the first task is completed we move on to the next task. Oh and right now he always wins Lynn Jordan New Castle Pennsylvania I find that my toddler is often upset at our playgroup because the other children take toys from him. I have even seen a few of the other children hitting when they become frustrated. The other mothers are busy talking with each other and often don t notice. How do other mothers cope with this How do you get your own needs for socialization met while keeping your toddler safe and happy and teaching kind behavior have two younger children--four and five--who love to help me clean the house. At times I get frustrated when their helping turns into more work for me. I want to encourage their participation. What have other mothers done to encourage their children s participation while still being able to keep up with the household cleaning I have a five year old who loves to help me with household tasks and it can be very frustrating. I try to give her tasks that will give her a sense of accomplishment. For example I will ask her to sort the laundry into piles or put all of her DVDs back into their correct cases. She can do these tasks with little supervision and it does not really matter if it is done absolutely correctly. For my longer cleaning tasks I find that it is helpful to have her doing something in the same room as me. I can give her a sponge or a broom and she can really clean one spot on the floor or table and keep up a steady stream of conversation as we work. For my daughter it is less about the tasks that we are doing than the chance to work side by side with me. She feels important and I get my cleaning done. The best part is that when our work is finished we always take the time to sit and have a special treat. This is our reward for a job well done Good luck to you Diane Andrews Gilbert Arizona Do the chore with them rather than having them do it alone. Guidance may help keep messes to a minimum. Roberta Newell via Facebook New Mother s Situation My children have been asking to get a pet. I never had a pet growing up and I don t have any idea how to go about choosing the right one for the family. What suggestions do other mothers have for deciding which pet is the best choice I feel that it is important to provide a safe place for my toddler to play and explore while in a playgroup. When we first arrive in a new place I will sit on the floor and allow my son to stay on my lap until he ventures out and interacts with other people. If children grab at a toy while my son is playing with it I will get down on his level and ask him if he was finished playing with the toy. If he s not finished I will try to find an equally exciting toy for the other child. Interacting with other mothers gives me a chance to get advice talk about my day or vent but our conversations are often paused while addressing our toddler s needs. I always address my son s needs first and then return to the conversation. Debbie Welch Harford County Maryland Talk with the other parents about how to make a play date comfortable for all of you. This can be a real challenge as a new mother because the situation of aggressive children other distracted mothers and general social disorder can feel overwhelming. Remember that mothers and fathers want their children to be safe and not to be the troublemakers as well as being able to enjoy their own social time. It might feel like the other mothers are less protective or more distracted--and sometimes they are--but they will understand if you voice your concerns. Strategies to improve an uncomfortable situation might include moving the conversation closer to the play area eliciting a friend directly to help asking the parent of a child with rough behavior to intervene or even Staying Home is edited by Cathy DeRaleau. An LLL Leader Cathy lives in New Castle Pennsylvania with her husband and five children. Please send responses and new situations to staying.home lllusa.org 16 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 Toddler Tips setting your own boundaries with the children. If these adults aren t receptive to your voice or strategies if they demonstrate repetitive lack of concern for their child s behavior or if they don t make any efforts to include your comfort in play dates then unfortunately if might be time to look for new social opportunities for your family. Choose play situations in your comfort zone and then you will discover that you can also meet your social needs at the same time. Katie Kutsy Harford County Maryland It s normal to have some negative interactions at a toddler playgroup. To a certain extent it s a learning experience for your child. You won t always be there to run interference for him and eventually he is going to have to learn what he is going to do when someone takes something from him or gets physical. If he and another child are squabbling over a toy it s okay to watch the interaction from a distance for a while. If it deteriorates into tears or your child is getting physically hurt then it is time to step in. Even if the other mothers are all chatting and ignoring their children approach the children and make sure the other toddler knows that hands are not for hurting. Try to get the children to take turns with the toy and distract with other activities or toys if they can t share. If your playgroup is one where none of the other mothers ever get down on the children s level and mediate behavior it might be time to find a different playgroup. If you want to stay with your current one you may need to accept that your social time is going to be curtailed in order to keep your child safe. Mommal via LLLI Mother-to-Mother Forums I tend to avoid mothers groups and instead seek out parents based on common interests and values. I ve been most successful in finding like-minded parents at places that include La Leche League meetings the library and museums. Another strategy that I ve adopted is to spend the daytime intensely focused on my son then take the evening and weekends when my husband is home to reconnect with my prebaby friends and attend university courses. This provides a good level of intellectual and social stimulation for both of us. Alphawoman via LLLI Mother-to-Mother Forums In a playgroup setting I would intervene by telling the other children something like Sammy is playing with this for a little while and then we will do a trade in five minutes. Christina Castro Falco via Facebook I think these times are a learning experience for both mother and child. It is inevitable that your child will be involved in some sort of squabble over toys. I found that I needed to closely look at what type of playgroup to go to and if the other mothers did not notice their child hitting mine I had to learn to intervene in a positive way. I would say to first observe what happens and if one child starts crying or is hurting the other get involved. Also give the children space to sort it out on their own because they can and often will resolve it. Maybe it s not in the way you might do it but the experience is beneficial. A playgroup can be a safe place to learn social behavior. As for getting my own social needs met this was not possible in playgroups but was achieved more easily by play dates at home. I found a couple of like-minded mothers and we would take turns and have play dates at our homes. In addition I asked my friends from pre-baby times to go to playgrounds with us or visit me at home or I visited them at their home. Mammi via LLLI Mother-to-Mother Forums New Mother s Situation I am in need of nap time help. My 17-month-old seems to be transitioning out of a nap--from two naps to one nap each day--but is resisting sleep even when I put her down for just an afternoon nap. She seems cranky almost all the time. Once she finally falls asleep she will sleep for almost three hours so I know she is tired. What does the nap time routine look like for your toddler I wonder if my daughter is so out of sorts because she still needs two separate naps or if it s because she s simply trying to be more independent. Toddler Tips is edited by LLL Leader Jean Merrill. Jean enjoys being at home in Maryland with her three delightful children watching them grow and develop as she writes. Send your questions or responses to toddler.tips lllusa.org 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 17 Making It Work Encouraging a Letdown while Pumping breast massage and compression while pumping can help. Tami Craven Moreau via Facebook Many mothers need to find the perfect combination to make pumping work for them. Try each of your senses sight sound smell touch and taste. Is there something you frequently munch or sip while you nurse Do you have a blanket of the baby s or even a onesie to smell Or a short video of baby giggles or cries One mother I knew had to dress a bag of sugar in yesterday s outfit and cradle it in her arms while she pumped. She needed the weight to trick her body into a let-down. Don t give up. Keep trying. Keep yourself calm and relaxed. You could try covering the pump flanges as you pump sometimes not watching the output is enough. Do you enjoy yoga Meditation Relaxation breathing can help many mothers relax enough to let down their milk. Reading watching television or whatever helps you to unwind at the end of the day is worth a try. Jennifer R. Staten Island New York You don t need a stockpile for when you go to work. Generally what you pump one day is what baby will drink the next. Your baby will also likely drink less when you are away and do more night nursing at first. Try pumping one breast while your baby nurses from the other. With my first baby I loaded pictures and videos on my smart phone to watch while pumping. Jennie Munster via Facebook Is your pump brand new or has it been used before Is the motor in good working order and the vacuum appropriate Were the flanges fit properly or do you possibly need a different size Milk release is helped by skin-to-skin contact. If you aren t with your baby a few moments of gentle breast massage can prime the breasts to let-down. Some mothers also need to push the milk out of the ducts with gentle pressure from behind the duct toward the nipple. Also remember that your body and your baby are connected. When you have been I ve been pumping for about two weeks in preparation for returning to work next month. The problem is that it is difficult for me to have a let-down and when I do I only get about an ounce on one side and a bit more on the other. I m really worried that I won t be able to build up the supply of expressed breast milk that I thought I would and that I won t be able to keep up with what my baby needs each day. I haven t had any supply problems. What can I do call and check on or listen to the baby before pumping get into a routine for pumping at work (this can train your body as you anticipate sitting down to pump) and use visualization while pumping. Ellen Kadden Fairfield Connecticut I found it harder to pump at home. Once I got to work it was much easier to pump during the normal times I would nurse my daughter. I kept the same schedule--maybe even pushed it a little to the point of being very full. At work while pumping if I didn t have a strong flow I would stop for a minute and think about my baby or look at a photo or video. This would usually get me over the hump and then I would be able to pump quite a bit. But whenever I tried to pump at home it wasn t nearly as much. Just keep on adding up those ounces. If you have enough for a couple days at the start then you should be able to stay on top of it and have enough. I also pumped in the middle of the night to stock up on extra milk. I d nurse when she woke up and then pump. If she didn t wake up at a certain time I would still wake up and pump. Ryan Green Beacon NY I found it helpful to pump one breast while baby nurses from the other as you establish your milk supply. I wanted to add that when you re at work make sure you are warm enough before and during pumping. Also First please understand that you only need enough milk for the first day away from the baby. You will be pumping at work to collect milk for the following workday. You make the most milk early in the day and because your milk lets down naturally when the baby begins to nurse an easy way to train your body to the pump is to pump right after the first morning feeding. This takes advantage of the naturally occurring let-down as well as the (usually) generous supply. You still may not collect a large amount of milk but by pumping at the same time on a regular basis you may gradually increase the amount of milk you can collect. If you continue this when you return to work you will always have a bit extra to add to what you collect during the day. Other tips that may help when you are at work are to hold an item of the baby s clothing or look at a picture of the baby before pumping 18 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 Making It Work getting only an ounce is that after your baby nursed Or at a time he would not normally be nursing You may find that you pump a very different amount at work Try to time your pumping around when your baby would normally be nursing (pre-nap post-nap lunch etc.). Your body is used to releasing milk at those times. Michelle Adelewitz Ithaca New York Some of the suggestions that seem to work for a lot of mothers include looking at photos watching videos (including sound) of baby to help the milk let-down pumping one side first thing in the morning when your storage supply is at its highest pumping on one side while baby is nursing on the other and the current favorite power pumping. For power pumping when baby is in bed mother sits down with her pump and a cup of tea (or other relaxing drink). Pump for 10 minutes rest for 10 minutes pump for 10 minutes and repeat for about an hour. Maribeth Cremer via Facebook I returned to work at 17 weeks. I found a support system of friends a lactation consultant and set small goals like getting through the first month. I also trained my body by pumping while nursing and doing fun things while pumping like shopping online. I made many calls to the lactation consultant for advice and support. I am proud to say I made it a full year pumping at work. Lisa Colagiovanni Poughquag New York First thoughts include what brand and model of pump Is it new or used Even new pumps vary in effectiveness and efficiency. Pumps all yield different amounts of milk even under the best of circumstances. Maybe consider a short-term rental of a good hospital-grade pump to get a better read on milk supply and to help increase and or build supply. The personal pump can still be used later on for maintenance. Once the efficacy of the pump is addressed also enhance it with milk promoting relaxation techniques such as a warm shower beforehand aromatherapy (lavender or baby scents) soft music selfmassage etc. Additionally spend time pumping if you missed a feeding after a feeding during less stressful times and even overnight for a few days. It just takes a few good pumping sessions to build confidence and get a jumpstart on stored milk supply. Lastly if pumped milk supply still seems low consider galactogogues such as fenugreek. Patricia S. Guzm n West Nyack New York New Mother s Situation My baby is nine months old. I ve been back to work full-time since she was six months old. She s always been an avid nurser at night and on the weekends but lately she just doesn t seem interested in nursing. Her daycare provider has told me that my daughter has been very hungry during the day and eats all of the solids and takes all of the offered bottles. Is she weaning I wanted to nurse until one year and am fine continuing to pump until then but I already miss her frequent nursing. Making It Work is is edited by Karin Ali a La Leche League Leader who loves to read and spend time with her family. She lives with her husband daughter twin sons and mother in Patterson New York. Send your questions or responses to making.it.work lllusa.org 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 19 Focus on Fathers Fathers Thoughts on Breastfeeding and Nursing in Public By Jodie Kilpatrick O ften society makes the concept of mothering through breastfeeding seem taboo and unnatural. I would nurse my children no matter what society says because of all the knowledge I have gained over the years through attending La Leche League meetings reading articles and books and the act of nursing itself. While I know how supportive my husband is of me breastfeeding our children I have often wondered what other fathers feel and think about a mother nursing her baby. So I took it upon myself to speak with males to gain their perspective on nursing in these modern times. Some of their answers were unexpected most were very encouraging and all were honest. Read on and you might be surprised about what they think I asked the following questions What do you think of a mother breastfeeding her child What do you think if you see a mother in public nursing her child It s perfectly normal James Webb 25 father of two I feel that barring rare medical situations breastfeeding is the absolute best way for young children to get the nutrition and antibodies they need. Breastfeeding is a skill. A mother making the effort to breastfeed today--when our society often seems so flippant about it--has my full respect. As a man it is hard to be openly supportive of a breastfeeding mother without coming off as weird. I do my best to not bring any attention to what she is doing but I would definitely step in and say something if I saw someone else giving a mother a hard time about breastfeeding her child in public. George Pohm 35 father of two It makes me happy because she is giving her child the best possible nourishment she can. Anonymous 34 father of seven I think it s great and I wish more mothers did it. While I used to feel less comfortable when I saw a woman nursing I understand that nursing in public can be challenging and those mothers deserve our support and respect. Stephen Johns 23 father of one A mother who breastfeeds is giving her child the best thing for him. Not only is she giving the child the nutrients and antibodies he or she needs but she is also giving them a sense of comfort and safety. She is showing her natural ability to sustain her baby s life. It Megan nursing Hazel is absolutely amazing what a woman s body can do. Just think about it. The mother can produce and give all the food nutrients fat and antibodies her baby needs. Amazing I find it completely normal and natural for a mother to nurse her baby in public. Mike Holmes 34 father of one Today science and technology are given an unwarranted place of honor in contrast to natural processes. Many women are looked down upon when nursing their babies in public even while covered up. It is regarded as an inappropriate activity in the community. The medical establishment is constantly seeking out ways to correct the imperfections and supplement natural processes with artificial ones. Yet studies have suggested that there is no better replacement for a mother s milk when it comes to nourishing their babies. Babies need proper nutrition to give them the best start in life and to avoid complications down the line. Mother s milk is made to order for her child a natural process that has been taking place since the dawn of time. And only now through scientific means can we fully understand the importance and brilliance of this natural process that many have taken for granted. 20 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 Focus On Fathers Breastfeeding in public should be considered as much a right in our society as the right of free speech if you don t want to listen to what someone has to say you choose not to listen. If seeing a mother nurse a child in public bothers you then look the other way and keep walking. When I see a mother breastfeeding her child in public I think she should be supported and congratulated for making a great decision regarding the care of her baby. I would be tempted to give her a high-five if it wouldn t be considered strange. Anonymous 27 father of two I noticed that a few of the fathers made a pretty similar statement If it wouldn t seem disturbing I d go over and tell the mother Great job or give her a high-five. I think this shared sentiment says quite a bit about our society s view on sexuality and breastfeeding. Nursing in general but especially in public can assist breastfeeding in becoming normalized. Try to encourage the normalcy by nursing your own children and also thank fathers who believe breastfeeding is wonderful beautiful and natural. Thanks to those who contributed to this column with these encouraging words Do you need help with a breastfeeding question La Leche League How Fathers Can Support the Breastfeeding Relationship Care for the other children while mother and baby are nursing. Hold rock or take baby for walks after nursing so mother can take a bath or nap. Encourage mother often and tell her how wonderful it is that she s breastfeeding. Bring mother food or drink while she s nursing. Help with household tasks including meal preparation laundry and dishes. Deflect negative breastfeeding comments from family and friends and share information about its benefits. Help mother get help if she needs it. Check www.lllusa.org for local or online support from a La Leche League Leader. Change diapers and give baths. These are not only helpful for the mother but also give the father a chance to interact and bond with baby. Get up with mother at night to see if she needs a drink or snack or if you can change a diaper. Those sleepless nights might not seem so bad when she has someone to support her. Take a breastfeeding class with her before baby arrives. Be hands on. If mother is struggling to position or latch baby on see if you can assist with placing baby in mother s arms moving baby s hands if they re in the way or placing pillows underneath baby for needed support. has many sources of breastfeeding information Answer Pages La Leche League Breastfeeding Answer Pages provide a single source for current breastfeeding information on a wide range of topics. Mother-to-Mother Forums Connect with other parents and La Leche League Leaders to discuss breastfeeding and parenting topics. Se Habla Espa ol Forums.llli.org index.php Ask a Question Find personal support in your local area or use our online help form. Use the map at www.lllusa.org to find an LLL Leader or Group near you. For more information visit http www.lllusa.org resources.html Mike Hazel and Megan Holmes Focus on Fathers is edited by Jodie Kilpatrick an LLL Leader with LLL of the Wiregrass Group in southeast Alabama. She is wife to Timothy and mother to Darren (15) Celeste (6) Lila (5) Conlan (3) and infant Rachel. As a family they enjoy bicycling dancing and traveling. Please send your submission to focus.on.fathers lllusa.org 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 21 Eating Wisely Children in the Kitchen Instilling Healthy Eating Habits By Amanda Jo Greep I f there s one thing most parents want for their children it s for them to be healthy eaters. Food is a cornerstone of wellness but how can you help your children learn to make wise choices it s been a particularly tough week ) and the routine will give your family something to look forward to every Friday. Bonus for parents one dinner every week is already planned Give them some control over food choices Children love feeling like they re in charge of themselves and food choices can be included in their decision making. Obviously with young children the adults in the family are going to play a role in their food choices but there are ways to involve them without becoming an overworked short-order cook at dinnertime. Invite your children to plan one family meal per week. For young children you may want to offer options to help make their choice easier. Think of a couple of things everyone likes to eat and ask them to choose the one they d like to have for that meal. For older children you can give more autonomy offering some loose guidelines to keep them on track ( we need one main dish a vegetable and another side. ). start cooking. If you re not sure where to start think simple. The aforementioned Pizza Fridays are a great first recipe tiny hands are perfectly capable of punching raw dough to help you knead. It is always a treat for them to choose and sprinkle on their own toppings. Children are also eager bakers. If you re feeling especially inspired (and sneaky ) this is an easy way to work in some subtle math and chemistry lessons. If you invest in some plastic measuring cups your little ones can help measure out the wet and dry ingredients. If you re nervous about them messing up the main batch you can provide an extra bowl with their own ingredients as a way to keep them busy and help them feel included without much risk. Mashing overripe bananas for banana bread is slimy fun and adding berries and cinnamon to muffin or pancake batter is hard to mess up. Cracking eggs is a great kitchen promotion for growing tots. (Tip always have them crack eggs into a separate bowl so you can fish out the inevitable shell pieces before you add them to the main batter). If you re looking for inspiration some of my favorite child-friendly recipes come from the La Leche League International cookbook Whole Foods for Kids to Cook. And if you type children s cookbook into any search engine you ll find dozens of options written to the child s perspective. Of course you can also work out of any of your regular cookbooks. So grab your child s hand roll up your sleeves and guide them into the kitchen. They ll thank you for it later. Start early With their very first bite of solid food your children are learning how to feed themselves and I don t just mean the mechanical aspect of it. Food can represent your heritage your values and your sense of adventure. Offer a variety of textures and flavors from the beginning and encourage your children to explore along with you at every meal. Slow down Today s families are notoriously busy. With more families having two working parents or a single parent--nearly two-thirds according to a 2012 study from the Center for American Progress--it is not always possible to prepare homemade meals or to sit down for a leisurely dinner together after a long day at work and school. But just because you can t manage it every day doesn t mean you shouldn t try to do it when you have the chance. Even the occasional family meal will help your children associate eating with love and togetherness and give you all a chance to catch up on things you may have missed on your busy days. Create a snack shelf Once children are able to feed themselves allowing them to follow their hunger cues can teach them important things about portion control and set them up for a healthy relationship with food. Set aside a shelf in the pantry or a drawer in the refrigerator for healthy child-friendly snacks. Set parameters as needed ( no snacks an hour or less before mealtime ) but try to give your children some independence and see how they handle it. They may overlook the lack of junk food available in excitement at being able to choose for themselves between two healthy snacks. It s a win for everyone. Create manageable routines Perhaps you don t want to dedicate every Sunday to slaving away in the kitchen preparing involved meals to eat over the next week. Start simple pick a night of the week and give it a theme. Pizza Friday is one example. It s very simple to throw together a pizza (or order for delivery if Invite them to join you Children love helping in the kitchen. From the toddler years on up your children can learn valuable lessons when you involve them in food planning and preparation. Toddlers and preschoolers are especially messy sous chefs but also among the most eager so don those aprons and help them Eating Wisely is edited by Amanda Jo Greep. She is a writer doula and proud breastfeeding mother. She lives in Chicago with her partner and two daughters. Submissions for Eating Wisely can be sent to eating.wisely lllusa.org 22 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 Eating Wisely Potato Head Whole Foods for Kids to Cook page 29 Makes one serving. One-Bowl Pancakes Whole Foods for Kids to Cook page 77 Makes three servings. Blueberry Pie Whole Foods for Kids to Cook page 93 Ingredients 1 potato Olives small pieces of fruits and vegetables Ingredients 1 cups whole wheat or other flour 1 tablespoon baking powder teaspoon salt 1 tablespoon butter 1 cups milk 2 large eggs Ingredients cup melted butter 1 cup graham cracker crumbs 1 cup whipping cream cup sugar 2 cups plain yogurt 1 (4-serving) package vanilla instant pudding mix Fresh blueberries Tools Fork potholder wooden toothpicks Ask an adult to preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Pierce potato with fork. Bake for 30 to 40 minutes until tender. Remove with a potholder and cool. Make eyes ears nose mouth eyebrows hair and hat with olives and pieces of fruits and vegetables securing with wooden toothpicks. Tools Measuring cups measuring spoons bowl spoon skillet fork pancake turner potholder Combine flour baking powder and salt in bowl and mix well with spoon. Melt butter and add to milk in measuring cup. Add eggs to milk mixture and mix well with fork. Stir into dry ingredients with spoon. Heat skillet over medium heat. Spoon batter into hot skillet with ladle. Bake until golden brown on both sides turning with pancake turner. Tools Measuring cups bowl spoon 8-inch pie plate deep bowl electric mixer Combine butter and graham cracker crumbs in bowl and mix well with spoon. Press into 8-inch pie plate. Beat whipping cream in a deep bowl with electric mixer for five minutes. Add sugar and beat until soft peaks form. Add yogurt and mix well. Stir in dry pudding mix. Spoon into pie shell. Chill in refrigerator. Spoon blueberries over top. And chill for five more minutes. Makes six servings. May substitute other fruit for blueberries. May make in 8x8-inch square dish. Fruit and Rice Dessert Whole Foods for Kids to Cook page 32 Makes six servings. Ingredients 2 cups cooked rice chilled cup chopped dates or other chopped dried fruit cup chopped nuts cup sunflower seeds (optional) 1 cup drained crushed pineapple 2 tablespoons honey Tools Measuring cups measuring tablespoon bowl spoon Combine rice dates nuts sunflower seeds pineapple and honey in bowl and mix well with spoon. Chill in refrigerator. May serve with fresh berries or whipped cream. 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 23 Active Living with Children Camping with a Breastfeeding Child By Winema Wilson Lanoue The Means Family One Family s Remote Camping Experiences and Tips (WMAs). I put her in a wrap carrier and off we went. Now we are gone for weeks at a time so leaving her behind is never an option. Additionally one of the driving forces in our family life is to raise a child imprinted on wild things not on electronics. We wanted her norm to be the woods and wetlands. We also wanted her to develop the confidence and skills that come from living outside even just for a few days. Her field chores have evolved as she has grown and it is spectacular to see her enthusiasm for learning grow from holding the tube while we pump water to helping build a fire and set up a tent. Another important outcome of bringing her with us is that her experiences will continue to be a part of who she is even if she doesn t specifically remember all of (the experiences) as she grows older. M any of us have great memories of camping throughout our lives yet we find ourselves hesitant to camp with our babies or even our toddlers. While there are probably many reasons for this hesitancy there are also lots of ways to make it workable. There is no doubt that breastfeeding can make it significantly easier to camp with a baby or young child. The thought of having to transport store and heat formula (or even pumped milk for a baby who cannot be at the breast for some reason) would make anyone nervous about being able to enjoy an extended time in nature. The breastfeeding mother however may find great enjoyment sitting on a boulder next to a rushing stream or in the shade of a big tree with her nursling contentedly feeding snuggled in her lap. Breast milk is always easy to transport and store and is always the right temperature. It can help reset a cranky toddler and make strange surroundings feel like home. Rebecca Means and her husband Ryan Means are wildlife ecologists and creators of Project Remote which is devoted to the preservation of the wild places of the United States (remotefootprints.org). They are also experts at camping with a breastfeeding child as they chose to include their daughter Skyla in their project which requires a great deal of extended hiking and camping in the most remote places in each state. In the following interview Rebecca tells us a bit of her own story and gives us some advice for having a good experience when camping with our own children. Read on and feel empowered to get out there and share the wonders of nature with your babies Was camping with a small child what you expected or were there things that surprised you If so what were they I was overwhelmed by the needs of a baby. I envisioned the camping experience to be a little simpler than it was with Ryan and I still doing our tasks around camp but with our child along. It turned out that I had to spend most of my time and energy tending to the baby and not to whatever I was supposed to be doing work-wise. Every child and their needs are different. Some become a little more independent earlier than others. Skyla was very mama-focused well into her toddler years. It was definitely an adjustment to accept that. When did you first begin to camp with Skyla Skyla was six months old when she first went camping. A friend and I drove to Maine with our children and camped out on some land up near Machias. Then the winter before Skyla turned one we camped in Florida. Why did you choose to include Skyla in your work and in remote hiking camping Ryan and I never considered leaving her behind or excluding her from our work. When she was a few months old we started taking her out in the field with us on our work projects. At that time we were doing inventory on wetlands in wildlife management areas How did breastfeeding help when hiking and camping It was an advantage in that I had instant comfort with me wherever we were. Mosquitoes are biting you and you are uncomfortable in these woods Let s nurse. Also not having to pack food for Skyla when she was younger was a definite advantage. When you are hiking you typically stop every few hours for a break anyway so I would not say the fact that I was breastfeeding slowed us 24 New Beginnings Issue 2 2014 Active Living with Children down by any means. When Skyla was small I carried her in a wrap so I didn t really even have to stop to nurse her. is constantly evolving. It is always easier when I accept that evolution. the stars) and now we can put her down in the tent anywhere say good night and she is comfortable enough to fall asleep on her own as she listens to the sounds around her. The physical aspects of camping with a small child are not always that hard it s your frame of mind that matters. Being outside is different than being at home and camping with children is different than without children. Don t try to make it the same. Accept and embrace what it is at that moment. Be realistic in your expectations of what you (and they) can do and you will have a much more enjoyable experience. What considerations did you have to make for a baby Was it different for a toddler Both ages have benefits and challenges. I wouldn t say either age is easier they are just different. For example with a baby you have to think about packing diapers whereas with a toddler you have to show them how to go to the bathroom out in the woods. With a small baby you don t have to worry about packing extra food like you do with a toddler. What tips or advice would you give to other parents who are considering camping with a nursing child I have all kinds of advice I created a blog called Traveling Trail Mix (http remotefootprints.org travelingtrailmix ) as a way to share my experiences good and bad with other parents. I would say don t worry about bringing toys or gadgets when you are camping. You have to pack enough stuff already. The outdoors is a fascinating place for children of all ages. There is so much that is stimulating so you don t need to bring more. In terms of diapers I personally recommend using disposable diapers for camping and backpacking. We were a cloth diaper family but if we traveled for a few days or if we were camping we used disposable diapers. It s easy to get caught up in an ideal philosophy--I certainly get a little obsessive about my impact on the environment--but I gave myself a break when camping. You can bring big zip-top bags to contain used diapers. (Editor s note remember that used diapers cloth or paper can attract bears so treat them the way you would food if you are in bear country ) This advice is for older toilet-trained children practice going to the bathroom outside several times before embarking on a backpacking trip. You may be surprised how insecurities with other things (i.e. a strange routine sleeping in a new place eating different foods etc.) can manifest in bodily function ways. Lastly indulge your little one. Their sleeping and eating routines will change while you are camping. Just provide them with what they need and don t worry that you are setting a new precedent. A campout may not be the time to focus on discipline eating habits and maintaining routine or control. If your child wants you to lie with him or her in the tent until falling asleep even if you no longer do that at home just do it. In fact it is very likely that they will need a little more comfort at first. I did this with Skyla at first (and missed many a night just sitting around the campfire enjoying What was your favorite thing about camping with a baby The best part of camping with a baby is waking up in the morning and watching her eyes and ears open to the sounds of nature. Skyla always woke up happy when we were camping. I also love the natural rhythms we as a family adopt when we are living outside. There are no outside pressures or stress to disrupt what we as humans have been doing for thousands of years waking feeding our family walking etc. Were there any specific tools that made things easier for you A wrap or sling that you are comfortable with is essential for infant camping backpacking. There are so many types of baby-carrying devices out there now. The best is one you like and can adjust and use easily not necessarily one that someone else recommends. When Skyla was about one year old we switched to a backpack carrier. If you are going to backpack or hike frequently it is definitely worth it to splurge for a high quality pack. The Means Family What do you think is the hardest thing about camping with a baby The hardest thing about camping with a baby is your lack of independence. Ryan and I as a couple had been a very efficient unit with specific tasks to accomplish when we got to camp. I no longer could do very many of those tasks because I was busy taking care of the baby. Also I missed the ability to sit down write and reflect about my day s experience. Overcoming those challenges was just a matter of changing my frame of mind and accepting and embracing the new norm. Also we learned to allow ourselves more time to set up and break down camp. Would you do anything differently if you were to do it over again I cannot think of anything I would change. If I could say anything to my past self I would advise her to embrace the new norm early One of our favorite parental sayings is This too shall pass. You lament some things that pass while you are happy to see other things go. Everything changes. My role as a mother Winema Wilson Lanoue is a LLL Leader a writer and an avid knitter. She lives with her husband Eric two sons Ezra and Zeb and daughter Vivienne outside of Blacksburg Virginia. 2014 Issue 2 New Beginnings 25 La Leche League USA has partnered with Charitable Hotels to provide an easy way for you to help strengthen LLL USA financially. Charitable Hotels is the world s first non-profit travel site. You ll get the exact same price as other travel sites and Charitable Hotels will donate its commission to La Leche League USA. Do you know of a business that might use Charitable Hotels to book corporate travel Or another non-profit that would like to raise funds through Charitable Hotels If so La Leche League USA could raise even more Contact council lllusa.org for more information. Book your next hotel stay with Charitable Hotels and support La Leche League USA Three easy steps to help support La Leche League USA 1. Go to CharitableHotels.org 2. Choose La Leche League USA from the drop down menu 3. Book your hotel stay book your stay e Click her